I stop to catch my breath
And I stop to catch your eye
No need to second-guess
That you've been on my mind
well I dream days away, but that's okay

It's like I want to hear a silent sound
And then hold it in my hand
But a rose won't blossom from a ground
Of desert sand, but I like to pretend that

One day I'll turn around, I'll see your hand reach out
I'm only fooling myself, yea yea yea
But maybe when you smile
It means you'd stay awhile
Just maybe you'd save me now
I'm only foolin myself, yea yea yea
I'm only foolin myself.

Well, now it's etched in stone
That I can't survive alone
You have the missing piece
That I need so desperately
Yes, I slip away to a day that'll never come

It's like a splash of water to my face
When I suddenly realize
That you could never find a place
For me in your eyes, and I don't know why I keep thinking...

-Only Fooling Myself
Kate Voegele

*

Hey dear all! (:

How have the weekends been for you all?

Mine were particularly well-behaved... HAHAHA.

There were loads of things in my head that I wanted to blog about over the course of the past few days, but you know. gen, being gen, she completely forgot about everything.
I guess we can only just hope that she'll remember bits and pieces of it as we read through her post, eh?

But anyway, I don't know if you guys wanna hear about my day, but here goes anyway.

I CUT MY HAIR YESTERDAY.

*does a happy dance*

I've been EXTREMELY TIRED of my stupid long fringe ever since... I grew a fringe. Roar.
Stupid, kept on falling into my eyes, into my line of vision, into stupid SWS's line of vision.
Everytime come call me up for stupid fringe. Ugh.

NOWWWW....
It's fantastic. I still have a fringe, but it's shorter! And thinner, not like that stupid thick lock of front face hair. DOUBLE UGH.
The back is trimmed into layers, and it looked so damn cool after the haircut.
NOW DON'T NEEDA TIE HAIR! :D

Annoying cousin calles me Fuji-Senpai now.

Anyway, that point aside.
With my new cut, I CAN TOTALLY LOOK LIKE AN ANIME CHARACTER OKAY HAHAHAHA.
Honestly! With a lil' bit of hairwax, and working my hair into anime-like hair strips, poof!
HEEHEE.

Thenafter, went to Cheryl Lit's house for... okay I don't know what to call it. A get-together?
Awwmann. If you guys haven't heard, cheryl lit transferred to MGS after the June Holidays.
Apparently she wants to take the O levels first cause she's gonna go to Australia, sometime later.

I wanna go Australia toooooo. ):

Played tennis with Angela, Charlene, Cheryl Lit and Mabes!
Shit no, I can't forgive myself when I thought I'd forgotten how it was like to play class games with you guys.
I LOVE PLAYING WITH YOU ALL.
It's fantastic how I can be myself around you guys. Unlike most other groups of people where, I shudder at the thought.

Not played tennis in ages. Muahahaha. I think I became super horrible, lol.

After tennis, went back upstairs to let cheryl open her presents.
HAHAHAH COOL. I love those headsets! I want them tooooo!
The super gigantic one, with built in micro-phone. Can you believe awesome?

Cherie, Sharmila, Joelle and Narmadha came at about 4pm.
Had a few games of catching (HEEHEE) before going back upstairs to stuff our faces silly with cheryl's wonderful cake-baking skills, orea, panda biscuis, drinks and pizza that came at about 6.30. Yumm.

We all watched Angus, Thongs and Perfect Snogging again. HAHAH FUNNY ALL OVER AGAIN. :D
Oh, and cheryl's little sister Chelsea was there watching too. I wonder how she took the making out part, whoops. And there were explicit scenes of thongs and push-up bras.
Oh-oh, maybe we shouldn't have let her watch it hahaha.

Had a really wonderful day, then went back with Angela and Sharmila.
Poor me, cause I wanted a window seat to sleep against, went all the way to the back of the bus, where you all know is a total bitch to sleep against. Dumb choice.

And guess what?

Throughout my entire trip back home, I was so conveniently sitting behind a couple practically making out.
GROSS MUCH. WHO MAKES OUT ON PUBLIC TRANSPORT?

It's not fair. Other people always get it better.
Stupid, everytime I see couples cuddling on the bus, it just gives me the shivers.
Then I remember when I once took a bus back from waaaay out in the East back home, a 2-hour-plus ride, all alone cause... nevermind. We'll just note that I didn't go there alone.
Then, as if to counter that, my thoughts will then race back to another time where I was on the bus again. Where it was all so, just so fantastic.
Stupid guy was so lazy, didn't wanna walk. Tsk, (:

Okay, back to stupid bus ride.
Apart from being surrounded by couples making out (no, literally),
Some really large beefy man smelling like smoke and burgers (that totally don't mix) came to sit beside me.
Totally killed my scent receptors. EW.

45mins of staring into space on the darn bus.

*

Wheelalala.
July will soon draw to a close. August will soon start.
I guess we both know what's coming ahead.
Who'm I to stop you from getting what you want, from doing what you want?
I'm glad for each time we had. But you said 'next time'.
Was that supposed to mean something? I dunno. But I know that I probably shouldn't get my hopes up.
Go ahead! Don't worry 'bout me. I'll be fine.

I'm only foolin' myself, aren't I?

*

"To be immersed in the raw ecstacy of pleasure,

to delight in its succulent enjoyment,

let your emotions flow,

and embrace the genuinity of the roar that trembles within your soul."